Baked Endives with Ham

It is confounding to sit halfway across the world, safe in my warm little office, with food in the fridge, my beloved books in their shelves, my loved ones wanting for nothing, and contemplate the havoc and terror wreaked on Japan. It leaves me speechless. All I can do is read the reports and look at the photos and grasp my head in disbelief. I cannot believe my eyes. The violent water coursing through streets, hurling boats aside as if they were made of feathers; entire villages obliterated; the newspaper saying that "one bright moment" was a man rescued on the roof of his house carried nine miles out to sea while his wife was washed away.

I look at that white plate with two baked endives sitting up there and I see so much more. A hungry, black tide swallowing up everything in its path. An old man walking along a cleared path through utter devastation, weeping. Two parents kneeling in front of the muck-slicked car that held the body of their daughter at the wheel. Nuclear reactors on the precipice. And everywhere desperately frightened people, bereft of everything. How on earth, I wonder, do you make sense of that? I can't.

And writing about anything else, about lunch or cupcakes or Paula Deen's artichoke-spinach dip, feels deeply weird. What I'd really like to do is bake a plate of ham-wrapped endives for every Japanese in need. But they wouldn't be just any old baked endives. They'd be magic endives, you see, that upon consumption would bring back the people washed out to sea. Would rebuild the houses in the blink of an eye, mop up the streets, repair the broken windows, straighten the downed power lines, make the nuclear nightmare simply disappear. And heal all the broken hearts, with just a few bites.

But I can't. These baked endives taste good, but they can't do any of the above. They can distract you while you cook, I guess, from the neverending loop of unbelievably bad news coming from the web, the radio, the television. But they can't make things right again, not even close. Stupid endives.

I don't really know what the right thing is to do at this moment. Besides donating money (please give, please). So I read about the small acts of kindness in Japan that show just what kind of a country it is, even when everything falls apart. I think about that woman washed away to sea and hope that I'll never forget her. I feed the one I love and bless the safe, flat country I live in, and give thanks for the strong walls of my apartment and the faraway ocean. I cook lunch and dinner and breakfast, over and over again, in gratitude for all that I have. That is, to paraphrase Ruth Reichl, my own moral responsibility.

And still, I wonder about devastation and tragedy, why some of us are spared, why so many aren't. In a way, it makes me marvel at humanity. How we keep going in the face of the kind of news - from all parts of the globe - that makes your knees buckle and your heart break, over and over again.

Baked Endives with Ham
Serves 2
Adapted from this recipe.

4 Belgian endives, halved vertically
Juice of a lemon
Salt and pepper
2 tablespoons unsalted butter
2 tablespoons flour
1 1/2 cups milk, room temperature
4 slices Black Forest ham or cooked ham, up to you, halved
2 ounces grated Gruyère cheese

1. Heat oven to 400 degrees. Remove the outer layers of the endive, trim the bottoms and cut out the cores. Put the endives, cut-side down, in a large skillet. Season with salt and pepper and sprinkle with lemon juice. Add 2 cups of water to the pan, cover and bring to a boil. Simmer for 15 to 20 minutes, until tender. Drain.

2. Melt butter in a saucepan. Whisk in flour and cook, stirring constantly, over low heat for 5 minutes. Slowly whisk in the milk, whisking all the time, in increments. Cook for about 10 minutes, until the sauce is thick and smooth. Season with salt and pepper.

3. Lightly butter a baking dish big enough to hold the endives in a single layer. Wrap each endive in a piece of ham and place, seam down, in the baking dish. Spoon the béchamel over the endives. Sprinkle with the cheese. Bake the endives for 15 to 20 minutes, until the sauce is bubbling and the cheese has browned. Serve hot.

Comments

[Richa]

Hi,

The recipe looks delicious,but I have one question. Actually we don't like ham,can we use chicken instead?

[jonquil]

tragedy doesn't have to make sense. it just is what it is, living as we do on a planet of shifting tectonic plates, building along the ring of fire. lovely post & links. thank you.

[Nuts about food]

I just wrote a post expressing the same things. Feeling utterly silly for talking about food in front of such tragedy. But I did anyway because I realized we must rejoice in our luck, think and pray for those who were not as lucky, be grateful for all we have. Feeling guilty will not change what has happened. Cooking means normality, that life goes on. Perhaps cooking will help some be distracted and soothed. For others it will signify doing something that will give a little normality to their otherwise overturned life.
These endives are comforting and reminded you how lucky you are, we are, so there cannot be anything wrong about them.

[stacey snacks]

Funny, I feel the same way, cooking and going on with life when all this crap is happening around us. We can only do so much from here. Donating to the Red Cross is a good thing.

I made Ottolenghi's Endive w/ Serrano ham with great success last night.
I am posting it tomorrow on my site. Very similar to this recipe here!
Stacey

[Giulia]

There is not much we can do when so far away, but send some money to those that can really help is truly valued and is something we usually can spare when we look at what we have.

The endives are something I had a child at least every 2-3 weeks. I find it hard to find nice endives here in Canada, the market usually has a couple very limp ones on display.

[Angela]

A lovely, selfless post and the perfect comfort dish to go with it. Years ago a Swiss friend served this to us for dinner and it was a delightful discovery. This California girl had never eaten cooked endive before. You've brought back a great memory and given be an idea for dinner.
Peace.

[Anna]

I, too, often wonder why I have been so lucky in life and spared from the disasters that affect so many people in the world. It just makes me feel like I have to do more and give more of what I can to those who need it.

[Monica]

Thank you, Luisa, for this lovely recipe and the link to Ruth Reichl's thoughts.

As another commenter said above, tragedy doesn't necessarily make sense. But we do what we can. Being grateful for what we have is among the simplest yet hardest tasks for those of us living in comfort.

[Jess]

Just beautiful, Luisa.

[Catherine]

That was a really wonderfully written post. It really does seem sometimes, with tragic story after tragic story on the news, like all I can do is sit and despair- trying to get my head around what's going on in the world and trying to find some way to make it right. But of course whilst there are things that I can do there is no cure all which will make everything alright again. No way to remedy the loss that things like this inflict upon people. It makes me feel so helpless that for the most part, all I can do is stand and watch.

But, as you say, we must rejoice in what we have. In this life, which can be so cruel at times, we must find joy in being alive, in the simple pleasures of cooking and eating, in baked endive.

[Michelle]

Beautifully said, as always. We are so lucky so we must help in some form or another.

[Kelly]

Lovely, just lovely.

[kim]

I work for a Japanese company, and was relieved to hear today none of my coworkers' family was affected. Still so many lives are uprooted or even ended, it puts my own grieves in perspective.
This is one of our national (Belgian) dishes btw, practically every family has their recipe. I don't cook this enough. It's comfort food at its best.

[Gemma]

Yes. I've been battling with this too. Focusing on anything else just feels trite and wrong but yet we can only watch and care and donate and carry on. Ruth Reichl's words express this perfectly, as do yours.

[Shellina]

Your compassion is beautiful. My sister is in the navy, and is currently helping in Japan- her reports back to us have been heartbreaking and encouraging. Thanks for posting- and yum, endives. ;)

[Kimberley]

Yes. I have been thinking about all of this too. It's overwhelming. All we can do is be thankful for what we've got.

[Sylee]

Thank you for this post. What's happening in Japan has left me speechless these past few days and it's lovely to find you giving voice to what I've been feeling.

[Pennie]

What a beautifully written post. Thank you for sharing your feelings on this unfathomable tragedy--you've inspired me. Your recipe is a lovely accompaniment, perfect comfort food to soothe the soul.

[Kim]

WOW! What a great way to eat endive! looks soooooo good!

[Keri]

This is such an amazing and evocative post. I too have found it difficult to think about much else, and have spent too much time looking at horrifying images and obsessively reading about the safety procedures of nuclear reactors in Japan. Not to mention thinking about how soon this may happen to us on the other side of the Ring of Fire. But in the end, I feed my children and tuck them in and tell them they are safe, because I am so thankful for them and for my health and for the blessing of being warm and fed and safe.

[Honeybee]

Well said, as always. It makes me so unspeakably sad to see those people who have lost everything. I pray for them and am thankful for what we have here. We must never take it for granted.

[gdlemaire]

Luisa - Your post is lovely as nice as it can be considering the pain and suffering in Japan... Our hearts go out to the Japanese people who have such a sense of community they wait in long lines for hours holding children and acting like everyone must behave themselves for the good of all... what a vision for many who only see disorderly, selfish, self-centered people... I should say the behavior of the Japanese should be a lesson to EVERYONE to observe and emulate.

The Endive dish... Oh heaven's pure joy. It is one of my top 10 things to eat. My husband calls them "Endive Normand" as his Mother, originally from Normandy taught him to make this dish. It is popular in France where Endives are luscious and plentiful and the ham or Jambon is remarkable... In Normandy, of course, the home of milk and butter, and beautiful rolling green hills we also find fabulous swiss or gruyere to add to the sauce and top the casserole with. We boil the endives until quite soft and leave them whole... My husband - an executive chef adds a touch of sugar as endives can be a little bitter,squeezes all the water out of them when cooled and wraps them in the best ham we can find here in Dallas/Ft. Worth, pours on the sauce, tops with cheese and bakes it until hot, bubbly and golden... If we have 6, I want 10; if we have 8, I want 12+... It is never enough, never.

This is a winter dinner that will warm the tummies of everyone who loves the smell, taste and feel of a comfortable home made meal on a cold day.

[Chihiro]

Your writing is so relatable, especially for me on this topic.

[tricia72]

nice post! a great dinner too.

[Sonia]

Beautiful, and touching post Luisa.
What the Japanese are having to go through is so devastating, the images that we are seeing are so awful they almost don't look real.
The dignity that the Japanese people are showing is an inspiration.
If cooking for your loved ones gives a bit of comfort and peaceful feelings then it has it's place I think.

[Charlotte]

Luisa, this is such a beautiful post - you so eloquently express what I've been feeling in my heart these past days. And like you, my inclination is to cook for those in trouble of any kind. These look divine and delicious. Thanks.

[Amy]

"I think about that woman washed away to sea and hope that I'll never forget her."
Ah this broke my heart. And I honestly don't know if it's because of the wrenching pain I feel when I hear a story like this... or if it's because of the reality that almost shamefully I oftentimes forget this pain and move on. I hope I never forget her either, or that you wrote that.

[Ella]

This looks delicious and I too feel the same way. It's really strange to blog about anything since this happened. I feel like I'm being insensitive every time I write something on my blog. I can't imagine what it must have been like to hold onto loved ones and then having them just swept away.

[Sprinzette @ Ginger and Almonds]

Your posts are so lovely, and this is particularly thoughtful. Both your writing and your recipes are inspirational.

[Kathleen]

My daughter and I made this recipe for endive wrapped in ham last night, and it was delicious. I like the bitterness of the endive mixed with the salt of the ham. It was a cold, dark night in California and with the news from Japan, the comfort of this food was a blessing. How brief and uncertain life really is!

[vanillasugarblog]

i know....lately i've been feeling so guilty with how everything is ok here but over there in japan it's not. my heart just breaks for them. i do worry about that nuclear power plant. i pray we finally get rid of those things...just too dangerous.
i wanted to say also that this recipe sounds good, really good.
great post too!

[A. Bear Sartorius]

Hello there,

I live in Japan as an English teacher quite far to the south in Kochi prefecture. I check your blog once a week, and just wanted to say to all those who write that their hearts and thoughts are tuned into the destruction up in the north you are all doing just what you can. Japan still hasn`t had time to fully comprehend the best way for other nations to help, let alone people like me who are safe within the country. Donate if you can, but mainly keep your hearts open and remember that in the face of great tragedy there must always be hope. Great post.

[Emily]

I couldn't agree more and how non-important some many little things on. Well said! I'm helping spread the word on my site through ABC. This recipe looks fantastic on a different note!
www.mrscapretta.com

[Diana]

Luisa,

Thanks for being so gorgeously respectful - love your post.

Australia.

[Joanna]

thank you for putting into words what so many of us have been feeling.

[Kathryn]

today's post made me cry - you've spoken for me. Thank-you

[Saori]

Your writing made me cry for the first time since the disaster. Beautifully written. Thank you.

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[the purcells]

just had braised endive for the first time last week and am in love - can't wait to try this recipe!

[Anna]

This is very similar to a dish my mum used to make, and she copied it from my granny...it is a typical "wirtschaftswunder-rezept", very rich, hearty food. As a child, I disliked endives, so I got bananas instead of them rolled into the ham. Yummy!!
And it is exactly the kind of comfort food I crave when the whole world seems to fall apart...