Melissa Clark's Coconut Barley Pilaf

Sometimes there's just no escaping a dinner disaster.

You can try as hard as you can, be armed with this recipe from the always-reliable Ms. Clark, can have lovely corn and vibrant green herbs from the greenmarket, a perfectly plump chicken breast from the gourmet grocery in the West Village, a sack of pearled barley from the now-defunct Balducci's and a luscious can of coconut milk, and things will still Just Not Work Out.

Hrrmph.

I mean, how many of you read this and got hungry right then and there? I can't have been alone. But what sounded so promising just ended up being this rather flat, pallid dish that I poked around on my plate for a while, feeling like a truculent third-grader while picking out nibs of corn with the tines of my fork.

If, and only if, you plan to attempt this yourself, here are my words of wisdom:

1. Don't fry the cashews with the chicken and then stir them into the stew at the end. This turns them soft and rubbery. And soft and rubbery cashews are Not Pleasant At All. Instead, toast them in a separate pan and strew them over the dish when you plate it. Crunch! Flavor! Delicious.

2. Melissa's method for cooking the barley just didn't work for me. It needed far more liquid than she said and more time, too. I cooked mine for 50 minutes and it was still too hard and chewy. Hard and chewy barley is not the same as al dente barley, not at all. Take it from me. Also, maybe two whole cups of barley is a little too much barley. I wonder.

3. How come the photo on the New York Times makes this dish look more like a barley salad than what I ended up with, a creamy barley stew? I don't know. But, in fact, the photo has a point. Maybe you should just cook the barley in salted water until it's properly done and then toss it with cubed, sauteed chicken, sauteed corn, a bunch of herbs and that jalapeño (try two!). Then you'd have a barley-corn-chicken salad that might have a bit of a kick rather than a coconut-barley-risotto type thing that will sit in your stomach like a lead weight and then also take up precious real estate in your fridge for five days before you can bring yourself to face the music and Just Throw It Out. (I'm really going overboard with this capitalization thing, aren't I.)

In other news, totally unrelated, I had my first (and please, God, make it also the last) meal at Katz's Deli (of Sally's infamous orgasm!) on Saturday afternoon. I think I probably aged about 26 days just standing in line, which might be almost as maddening as the (double) line at the Angelika Theater. Not that the corned beef wasn't delicious! It actually really was, as was the sour pickle it came with. But $14.95? For a pile of meat on rye with a freaking pickle alongside it and no table service? Holy highway robbery, Batman.

Next time I attempt a New York institution, I'm going to aim a little higher, I think. Babbo, anyone?

Comments

[maggie]

Ugh, it's so painful to throw out leftovers of something that just kind of wasn't any good. But I always repeat to myself a saying of my mother's: "You are not a human garbage disposal."

[christina]

I feel your pain. It's really a bummer to spend time making something that in the end is really sub-par, yet it's equally as painful to throw it out!

[Jennifer]

Sorry about your unfortunate recipe downer. Your photo surely jazzes it up though. This Katz's Deli sounds like a roast beef joint we have here. A take out order of two humble sandwiches and a couple sides may run you a $70 tab. Highway robbery, indeed.

[Heather]

Oh, sorry to hear it didn't work out for you! I actually printed it immediately and took it home to make a modified version: subbed 10 oz. firm tofu for the chicken, peanuts for the cashews, 1 c. short grain brown rice for the barley, and a super hot red pepper for the jalapeno - these were all just based on what I had in the kitchen. I think I may have also used peanut or canola oil, and I added mint and cilantro at the end - the fresh herbs were definitely key for finishing. I agree with your advice about the nuts - the reheated leftovers made for a somewhat odd peanut consistency. Overall, though, I really enjoyed this dish, and it definitely hit the comfort food spot. Let us know if you try it again in a more salad-y version!

[TheKitchenWitch]

Hmph. Don't you just detest it when a dish sounds gorgeous and disappoints? It makes me quite cranky.

I'm with you on Katz's...just too much. Of everything.

[Adrienne]

Well, I can't say I got immediately hungry when I read it, but it did look at least appetizing... sorry it didnt' work out for you, and thanks for the jalapeno idea!

[david]

Well, I always eat enough of the half-sours so that no matter how high the bill is at Katz's, it's still a good deal considering how many pickles I was able to consume.

[Keri]

I tried it too, and really, really wanted to like it, but blech. It was too bland even for my four-year old, and the baby turned up her nose as well. Oh Melissa. You never steer me wrong...until now.

[margot]

made the coconut barley pilaf the day it was printed, but subbed brown rice for the barley for the gf boyfriend and tempeh for the chicken for me, the vegetarian - but yes, generally same conclusion. not very bright dish and extremely heavy. such a poor use of fresh corn! i managed to eat the leftovers but felt like i had a lead weight in my stomach for the rest of the day.

[bethh]

dang, it LOOKS good in your picture (with some greens or something alongside it) but the liquid seems to be about half what barley would require. Weird.

[linda]

I made this for dinner last night. I agree with you totally. How could a recipe this far off make it in the Times? There was not enough liquid for the barley. It needed at least twice as much. The herbs and cashews are much better added at the end. A generous squeeze of lime juice helped improve the taste at the end.

[noelle {simmer down!}]

It's so unfortunate to spend the time and money on a dish and have it turn out so... well, strangely. That said, I love that you post about the duds as well as the successes; we can learn just as much if not more from them. Here's hoping the latter are much more frequent than the former, though!

[Zoomie]

Thanks for the heads-up on this one. It looked and read delicious. It does give me an idea, however, for how to use up my leftover brown rice. Gonna do something with toasted nuts and maybe celery and a little jalapeño to wake it up? Anyway, thanks!

[Maxanna]

I'm going to chuckle for some time over this food adventure of yours- so "real life" and so very funny. So much more entertaining (and informative) than the "blah, blah, blah" and it was delicious as promised...
And I love, absolutely love, your picture of the pickles- Wow- great work! Max
PS- I've been following you for better than a year- your blog in my #1 spot for food blogs- keep up the great work.

[Leland]

Reminds me that we made tentative plans for an after-work bar dinner at Babbo about three years ago. I'm still game if you are!

[Ashley]

You've saved me from the rather upsetting task of throwing away leftovers - and that of trying a dish that just won't work out. Thanks for your kitchen wisdom.

[Meri]

Sorry it's not what you were hoping for. But the changes you suggested sound good and maybe we should try it that way (boiling the barley separately, and toasting the cashews and tossing them at the end). The combo of ingredients sounds really...sometimes a recipe just needs to be tweaked to the point where it's a different recipe, eh? But, for what it's worth, I really do like barley risotto and/or barley pilaf.
Ciao for now,
Meri

[jenny]

omg, that sounds horrid. this recipe is hereby purged from my "to try" file. I hate to say it, but melissa clark has always been a little hit-and-miss for me. sorry this was a miss.

speaking of something lighter, brighter, and still nytimesy, what did you think about the appetizing factor of mark bittman's sweet potato salad action last week? I was definitely intrigued ...

[Sylvie]

How annoying that it didn't turn out. There is nothing more frustrating! My experience of Katz's Deli is good matzo ball soup and fries, but brown salad and grumpy girl at the register.

[Stephanie]

At least you got Katz out of your system, as well as the barley recipe. Now you can move on, and Babbo is fab u lous.

[Amuse-bouche for Two]

Good luck with that Babbo thing. We attempted no less than three times on our last trip to NYC and we failed miserably each time. The place was always packed. Always. :) I guess it didn't help that we didn't have reservations. Silly us. Our hotel was right across the street. Nope, didn't matter.

[jenny]

I, too, made this recipe and was less disappointed than you. Tho, I still never got the barley cooked thru (a girl does have to go to bed SOMETIME!) I would have also added more jalapeno and added the cashews at the end. I added quite a bit of rooster sauce to give it a kick which helped. And as for Katz's, I've always scoffed at their prices for what you are getting. Delicious, but pricey!

[Kelly]

I also have a disappointing barley risotto taking up valuable fridge space. Sigh, I hate wasted food.

Thanks for reviewing this. Now I know that this won't be the recipe to restore my relationship with barley.

[Lisa]

Now this is really interesting -- I've never cooked barley before, but I followed Melissa Clark's recipe too and it came out just fine. I cooked the barley at medium high heat with the specified amount of liquid and it was tender in less than 30 minutes. It was nicely textured (a bit chewy) and not at all soupy. I added cut up chicken from a roast, plus cashews, at the end -- letting them heat up from the barley. With a bunch of "rooster sauce" dripped on at the end, this was a really tasty dish.

[HP]

Hm. Well, maybe Melissa Clark just typed it wrong, and wrote "Coconut Barley Pilaf" when she was really giving us a recipe for "Coconut Barf."

[Leigh]

I hate when a recipe disappoints. As for Babbo I think you'll feel the same as Katz. It was super expensive for some ok food with tiny portions. I think it is for business people with large expense reports.

[ann]

With you on Katz's. I have recently become obsessed to a nearly dangerous point with Barny Greengrass. In fact, I'm contemplating going there for breakfast for the second time this week. The prices are a little better than Katz's, but still spendy, but spendy in the kind of way that makes you feel swish and happy, not poor and sad. But I'm a smoked fish addict, so maybe I'm just delusional :-)

Sorry about the barley. What an uncommon fail from Ms. Clark.

[Luisa]

Maxanna - thank you!

Leland - we're on.

Jenny - I'll have to look for that salad, I didn't notice it.

Lisa - I wonder if maybe different brands of barley cook in less time or with less liquid? That would explain some...

[giao {kiss my spatula}]

just the sound of the word 'babbo' is enough motivation for me to get a plane for nyc! :)

[AA]

Barley is fickle. How long it needs - and how much water it requires - varies. Perhaps depends on how old the barley is? Who knows? I make a barley pilaf all the time, but I adjust liquid and timing as needed. I would also add that I find that barley needs to be cooked in stock to be tasty (vs. bland) and that barley pilafs taste better after they've had a chance to sit for a while.

[alicesoup]

I made the pilaf and was disappointed too. The most misleading thing was that the she said she created this dish because she had a craving for coconut rice... unfortunately, it was nothing like coconut rice! It felt like work to eat this dish when coconut rice usually melts in your mouth effortlessly. I've been disappointed in NYT recipes in general lately. Hopefully, this will end soon!

[eloise]

I snorted with laughter at your 1st line, Paul asked why & showed him the Brains On A Plate piccy you'd posted! Sorry it didn't work out, but your infrequent kitchen disasters are nicely reported! You're right though, wasting food does grate.

Some, few, tourist traps are worth the premium. My London touristic indulgence is Champagne tea at the Ritz on Christmas Eve- at the time, thoroughly worth the £45 each (ouch!).

I'm looking forward to your bounce-back post soon; chin up!

[Jennifer]

Ah! I had the same experience! The article made the dish sound absolutely delicious, when it reality was sort of bland. Mine wasn't a risotto-texture as yours - mine was more like a barley salad, but I barely tasted the coconut & the jalapeno. So disappointing.

[Anna]

Thank you for your post! It expresses EXACTLY how I felt when this exact same experience happened to me. The article lured me in, and the results were so dissappointing! Unexpected from Melissa Clark.

[TheWoman]

We've all been there! Even worse is when you've got company over and your dish turns out to be a bit of a dud. Yes I know, you should only make tried-and-tested recipes when you're hosting a dinner party, but come on now, where's the adventure in that? :-)

[Lynn D.]

I read this in the Times too and thought "no way." I think it's just wrong to mix barley and coconut. Barley is northern and coconut is tropical. And yes, different types of barley have vastly different cooking times.

[anencourager]

I am with ya in the tried-it-but-didn't-work dilemas. Loving pumpkin as I do in the autumn months, I tried a new recipe - Pumpkin Quiche. I mean, why not mix two yummy ideas? A friend said that even the name made her sick; and that's how I felt after trying the recipe. But... I'm game to always keep trying! :)

[thecatskillkiwi]

or check out some of my NYC value food deals...
http://thecatskillkiwi.wordpress.com/2009/10/09/value/

it will not dissapoint!

[thecatskillkiwi]

sorry my enthusiasm got in the way of my feeble spelling... disappoint!

[Gillian]

Hi Luisa: I sent you some blog love over at unfussyfare.com. I'm a huge fan and a total lurker. Now that I have my own blog and see how comments are part of the fun, I'm stepping out of the introverted shadows. Best, Gillian

[Gillian]

oops. posted with the wrong url. sorry. take two.

[Jennifer Perillo]

I was just saying the same thing about Katz's to a friend. The inclination is to say you get your money's worth because it is so good, but if you can't eat it all and don't have the means to take the leftovers, well, then...

[Anne Marie]

I have met with similar disappointment while trying several dishes labeled "pilaf." They are usually quite bland at best and at worst, a gluey mess. Dishes like grain salads and fried rice, usually hit the mark, however, and I'm beginning to wonder where the difference lies. My quick conclusion involves one concept: umami. Perhaps our pilafs need something zesty to perk them up for our demanding palates, something like soy sauce, vinaigrette or a similarly tangy ingredient.

[Michelle]

Ah yes, Katz's...well, institutions are instituted no matter how far the fall from grace.

Babbo's line will likely be longer than Angelika's, but like that fabulous-theatre-I-miss-more-than-I-can-say, it will surely deliver a good night out.

[Maureen Null]

Actually my husband & I really liked this dish, although I agree about the amount of barley & liquid. I had to add the extra 1 1/2 cups liquid which added almost 45 min of cooking time. I subbed pine nuts for the cashews and they were not soggy at all. I lost the recipe and am so glad I just found it via your site---thank you. I am making it tonight with a little less barley [1 1/2 cups]. I liked the fact it was like a risotto---that is what I expected. Nice flavors with coconut/corn/jalapeno.

[Melissa Clark]

Ouch! Sorry Luisa. I know barley is really tricky and both the cooking times and the amount of liquid needed varies tremendously from one brand to the next (maybe they use different strains of the grain?). I've found the same thing for farro. Sometimes it cooks in 20 minutes, sometimes it takes 1 1/2 hours. Whole grain and barley recipes, they're finicky.
Anyway, I'm sorry the recipe was a bummer! I liked it when I made it but I haven't made it since.

[www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1094850645]

Hi Luisa, I've never written on a blog before, wonder if it will work. I spoke to Ann last night. Congratulations. And how nice that you'll be coming to Berlin.
I love Katz's, it's one of my pilgrimmages when I visit New York. Must remind me of my childhood. If I buy a pastrami sandwich, I take home most of the meat and eat it the whole week. And everything looks so unhealthy, so politically incorrect, that I find it appealing. I wanted to post a picture I took there, but I can't figure out how to do it.
After reading something you wrote, I started thinking about where my Heimat is. I think it might be the Upper West Side. Or maybe the A train.
All the best, Jane

[Luisa]

Melissa - I think you're right, it's just different from bag to bag. Different strains, maybe from different countries? Who knows. Anyway, looking forward to your next recipe. :)

Jane - Thank you! I'm glad to be coming back, too. That's so interesting that after all these years in Berlin, your Heimat is still somewhere in New York. But actually, it makes total sense. See you soon, I hope!

[Celin]

Thank you for sharing your thoughts and reasons for moving back to Brussels. I can relate to your story..... I'm glad to hear that you will continue writing in your blog.

[Luisa]

Celin - Berlin, not Brussels! :)